Here we are.
We’re just a few short hours away from 2018.
Does anyone else here make New Years’ Resolutions? Anyone else completely fail at them before February comes around?
I want to lose some weight.
I want to read a hundred books in 2018.
I want to publish a book in 2018.
So many resolutions, so little time. We’re always striving to better ourselves, to “find yourself”, to be “true to ourselves”.
If you’re around my age (late teens, early twenties – we call it young adult 😉 ), you know that we’re in a scary part of our lives. We’re making some of the biggest decisions of our lives – workplace, choice of car, choice of partner, place to live. If you’re like me, you’re terrified of making mistakes, of failure.
There’s a reason adult became a verb during this generation – adulting. We’re scared. So. Very. Scared.
Let me tell you what I’m terrified of. Let’s be vulnerable for a couple of minutes.
I’m afraid to be bold.
I’m afraid to be different.
I’m afraid to be amazing.
I know, I know, It sounds arrogant. Suck it up. I’m not apologizing for fueling your insecurities. If you’re using me as an excuse to stop doing what you’re doing, then you were looking for a reason already.
Something I’ve learned over the last year is that I’m different. No, I’m not unique. Everybody’s unique.
I look at the world differently than other people do. Is it my MK upbringing? My firstborn status? My more old-fashioned, fundamental upbringing? Or did God just make me this way?
This last year, I learned that I have potential. I am strongly self-motivated. I’m determined. I’m focused.
In a world of writers that write 500 words a day, I can write 20,000. I can write, revise, and publish a good book in a month. (And yes, I’m allowed to call my own books good.)
In a world of people who need eight hours of sleep, I can work off seven (which is still healthy, I’ll assure you of that.) In a world of people whose best words leave their mouths, I’m a girl who will forever best be able to express herself with her fingers.
But, guess what? I’m terrified to be amazing. I’m terrified to be a leader. I’m terrified to break the mold because, once the mold is broken, so are my walls.
I’m terrified to pitch a baseball in the back yard because “Bekah’s playing ball? Is the sky falling?”
I’m terrified to wear bright red lipstick every once and a while, because I don’t know how to answer the question: “What’s the occasion?”
I don’t need an occasion.
I don’t need an occasion to try something different.
I think we’re all terrified of change, because change breaks us out of comfort zones and breaking those walls hurts.
This year, I’m challenging myself to be bold. I’m challenging myself to change up my life myself, not just because of external circumstances.
Oh, more Christian, fundamental readers, I can hear you already. “This sounds like a whole lot of self-fulfillment, secular stuff.”
Here. Check this out.
The wicked flee when no man pursueth: but the righteous are bold as a lion. – Proverbs 28:1
I am 100% convinced that my chosen career – writing – is God’s chosen path for my life. I am 100% convinced that God can use my writing for good in this world. I’ve seen it happen already.
Through God, I am righteous. I don’t need to run from other peoples’ opinions – half the time, other people probably don’t care what I do with my life. In God, I can be as bold as a lion.
Consider also Romans 8:31:
What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?
God himself told Joshua (chapter 1 verse 9)
Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.
Joshua set forth to conquer Canaan at God’s command. I set forward to conquer my own fears, at God’s command. After all,
For God hath not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7
There’s no reason for me to be afraid of other peoples’ opinions. There’s no reason for me to be ashamed to talk about the amount of writing I’ve done or the books I’m publishing.
There’s no reason for me not to wear heels or walk confidently into a room. I don’t have to be afraid to say yes, I want something, rather than shrugging and saying “sure”. There’s no reason for me to be afraid to take my life by the horns and change.
There’s no reason for me to be sucked into playing basketball just because not playing it in my family is practically a crime.
As long as I am within God’s will for my life, then I can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me.
So that’s my challenge to myself this year. I will be bold. I will not be afraid to stand out, to be different, to be amazing. Because that’s the way God created me, and I’m not holding back.
Look out, world. Rebekah DeVall is on the scene, and she’s got the creator of the universe at her back.
I resolve not to hold back. I resolve to live my life to its fullest, to trust you with the rest. I resolve not to be afraid of what other people think of me, because Your opinion is the only one that matters.
I resolve not to hold back from being all that You created me to be.